The Economic and Financial Crimes Commission “carry” you? What’s there? It simply means you have arrived! Whatever you do, never plead guilty! The EFCC’s budget is not even up to N15bn, yet as a bonafide big thief worth N25bn, you already know you can match the EFCC naira for naira. Remember that its budget will not even be used to fight you alone, it has to fight other big thieves like you. When broken down per capita thief per thief, the EFCC probably has just about N100m to fight you. Before the battle gets started, your advantage over the EFCC cannot be over-emphasised but you must do more.
This is the time to remember you are a Christian and do not forget that the President is a Muslim. Every political battle is a battle of narratives before anything else, so you must make sure to sponsor analysts to critique the President’s inclination towards only going after thieves who are Christians. Some “oversabi” people will try to point out to you that he is also going after Muslims but that is not your business; your business is to focus on your agenda and spend and spend until you believe your narrative is actually the truth. In this game, the truth takes the shape of the glass you want it, the truth is not absolute here. Remember to let people know that the EFCC is coming after you because you are not from Daura. Have you not noticed that nobody from Daura has been charged by the EFCC? So, scream until Nigerians believe you. Let me tell you something about an average crowd, they do not exactly care for the truth, they care for who is able to dress their own truth best.
